Just wondering if Scientologists really believe this or if it is just an joke about other religion, like believeing in god and stuff.

75 million years ago, there was an alien galactic ruler named Xenu who was in charge of 76 planets in our part of the galaxy, including our own planet Earth, whose name at that time was Teegeeack.

All of the planets Xenu controlled were over-populated by, on average, 178 billion people. Social problems dictated that Xenu rid his sector of the galaxy of this overpopulation problem, so he developed a plan.

Xenu sent out Tax Audit demands to all these billions of people. As each one entered the audit centers for the income tax inspections, the people were seized, held down and injected with a mixture of alcohol and glycol, and frozen. Then, all 1.4 trillion of these frozen people were put into spaceships that looked exactly like DC8 airplanes, except that the spaceships had rocket engines instead of propellers.

Xenu’s entire fleet of DC8-like spaceships then flew to planet Earth, where the frozen people were dumped in and around volcanoes in the Canary Islands and the Hawaiian Islands. When Xenu’s Air Force had finished dumping the bodies into the volcanoes, hydrogen bombs were dropped into the volcanoes and the frozen space aliens were destroyed.

However, Xenu’s plan involved setting up electronic traps in Teegeack’s atmosphere which were designed to trap the souls or spirits of the dead space aliens. When the 1.4 trillion spirits were being blown around on the nuclear winds, the electronic traps worked like a charm and captured all the souls in the electronic, sticky fly-paper like traps.

The spirits of the aliens were then taken to huge multi-plex cinemas that Xenu had previously instructed his forces to build on Teegeack. In these movie theatres the spirits had to spend many days watching special 3D movies, the purpose of which was twofold: 1) to implant into these spirits a false reality, i.e. the reality that WOGS know on Earth today; and, 2) to control these spirits for all eternity so that they could never cause trouble for Xenu in this sector of the Galaxy. During these films, many false pictures were implanted into these spirits, which resulted in the spirits believing in all the things that control mankind on Earth today, including religion. The concept of religion, including God, Christ, Mohammed, Moses etc., were all an implanted false reality that to this very minute is used to control WOGS on earth.

When the films ended and the souls left the cinema, they started to stick together in clusters of a few thousand and remained that way until mankind began to inhabit the earth. Today on earth all the spirits of these aliens have attached themselves to our bodies and are the root cause of the false reality that all but Scientology’s OT 8′s on earth experience. It is the job of all Scientologists to remove this false reality from the world by auditing each and every space alien spirit and human on earth to CLEAR not only this planet but the universe. For those who oppose Scientology and stand in their way like the LMT and all Scientology critics, Scientology promises to do away with them “quitely and without sorrow”.

I have calculated that on average, each person on planet earth has 2,314 of these Body Thetans (BT’s for short), Hubbard’s term for the alien spirits, causing you and all mankind to be constrained by Xenu’s false reality. The average cost for Scientology to OT 8 is a mere USD 360,000, meaning that each BT only costs USD 155.57 to clear. Now that is a bargain if there ever was one.

Hubbard never said the overall cost to the planet would be cheap, but let’s examine it. The planetary cost equation is as follows: 1.4 trillion spirits times USD 155.57 equals a mere USD 2,104,550,960,000. Just think about it — USD 2.2 quadrillion — shit, that’s enough to keep Rear Admiral Miscavige and Marty in casino chips for a long time.

As for Xenu, the Loyal Officers of the Marcab Confederation finally discovered how evil he was and overthrew him. He is now locked away in a mountain on one of the planets and kept in by a force-field powered by an eternal battery. Several of Xenu’s relatives can often be found on ARS.

Do they???????????